For better, for worse

For better, for worse…

For richer, for poorer…

In sickness and in health…

Yeah, yeah, yeah.  I got all that jazz and I’m cool with it.  I wouldn’t give up IP for anything or anyone.  Well, maybe Donnie Wahlberg.  No.  Yes.  No….. I’ll get back to you on that one.

Anyway, I’ve come to realize, after 15 years of marriage, there needs to be an additional section in the vows where your beloved has to lay all their cards on the table, all those annoying habits and weird nuances, giving us all a little pre-warning upfront of the future we face.

Now I could talk about farting, clothes on the floor, and the likes, but those are the obvious issues one faces with a husband.  I mean these.

1.  Your future husband does not share your obsession to detail.

IP doesn’t usually carry cash.  He’ll use the debit card if he’s out and needs to buy gas, pick up lunch, etc.  He tries to remember to tell me when he’s done this, so I can write it in the checkbook.  This is our typical conversation.

“I bought gas today.”

“How much was it?”

“57.87 or 57.07.  I don’t know.  57 something.”

I’m one of those ‘balance the checkbook to the exact penny’ people.  57 something doesn’t go in evenly into my calculator.  I’m also not ok if you say 57.87 and it really turns out to be 57.07.  So, I end up digging through this.

photo copy 9

Silver lining….at least he keeps them.  Plus, while I’m trying to figure out the something missing from the 57, I usually find the lunch receipt he forgot to tell me about too.

2.   Your beloved is a tree-hugger….sort of.

Everyone goes green in their own way.  I’m all about recycling and saving the environment.  I have an extra weekly recycling bin and try to recycle everything that I can.  But I do have limits.  IP is convinced that you cannot throw batteries away when they die; that they will hurt the landfill.  When batteries die in our house, they go here.

photo copy 8

What, you say?  You don’t have years worth of batteries lying around in your basement?  What kind of person are you???

He claims there are places that recycle them.  I do not know of such places.  So, I have this collection.  I wonder if there are any boards on Pinterest for ‘Fun Things to do with dead batteries’?

3.  Your betrothed adheres to a strict “waste not, want not” philosophy on everything….well except one thing.

IP will wear the same shoes for years.  He’ll scrap the bottom of jars to get out every last bit.  He’ll drink the last…um wait, scratch that.  IP’s taste buds believe that, despite when it was originally opened, the last few fingers of a 2 liter bottle of pop are flat, fizz-less, tasteless, potentially deadly, and, therefore, unconsumable.  I frequently come home from work and find this scenario in my fridge.

photo copy 7

Somehow, I have managed not to die my drinking the last of all of these 2 liters.  It’s a miracle!

For better, for worse

For richer, for poorer,

In sickness and in health

In lost receipts and missing digits,

Knee-deep in dead batteries,

In flat, fizz-less soda,

Til death do us part

(Anyone see Donnie Wahlberg yet? No?)

Ok…

I Do.

 

The other S word

“No more pencils, no more books, no more teacher’s dirty looks…”

Schools out for…Spring Break!  (Hey I get called plenty of S words a day.  It’s about time I gave one back!)

That’s right ladies and gentlemen.  It’s that other break that is music to the ears of those in education, Spring Break, coming second only to those other magical words…Summer Vacation.  (But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  We still have 9 weeks to go!)

Spring Break always awakens in me all those feelings of renewal and rebirth.  It’s a time for me to throw back the curtains, dump out those drawers and reorganize my chaos for a fresh new season.

I was so excited for spring break this year that I could hardly contain myself.

Weeks ago, I started making a list of all the things I would get accomplished.  Closets cleaned, drawers straightened, flowerbeds and yard raked, paperwork filed, holiday preparation done, photos in the photo albums, scrapbooks up to date, books read….oh all the books I was going to get read.

Then I looked at the calendar realized the joy of all joys….

MY BREAK IS THE SAME TIME AT MARCH MADNESS!    I know I have mentioned time or two that I am a slight insanely, ridiculously obsessed sports fan.  March Madness is such a great time of year that even the novice of fans fills in a bracket and sneaks a little game watching when the boss isn’t looking.  Usually I’m stuck at work, so I’m connected to my computer those first two days of the tourney, hoping to catch a glimpse of an upset or that must-see buzzer beater.  Now, thanks to the school calendar scheduling gods, I will be home in my sweats, kicking back on my couch, getting to see every glorious second!  (Can you tell I’m excited?)

Well the final bell ran on Friday and I couldn’t get out of the building fast enough.  Sayonara school halls….see you in 10…maybe.

It’s like all that crazy, pent-up energy from the first three quarters of the school put me in hyper drive and I hit my to-do list with a speed and swiftness I didn’t know I had.

Day one – closets cleaned, drawers straightened, donation pile made, rooms all spic and span.

Day two – Garage cleaned and organized, Christmas lights down (yes, finally), yard picked up, garden raked and ready, business paperwork caught up.

Day three – Photos in photo albums (Yes, I still print all my pictures and make photo albums.  Nothing digital will ever be the same as flipping through an actual photo album!), scrapbooks current (Yes, I make the kids scrapbook pages from each school year.  They’re not as pretty as some other’s make, but my kids love them and I love reliving the year as I do them.), shopped for upcoming birthdays and holidays, finished book #1.

photo copy 8

photo copy 7

Day four – Car to the shop for a quick fix, more business paper work, decorated for the Easter, start book #2….

photo copy 11

You know what happens when you are super, duper organized?  You get everything done before noon on Tuesday of your Spring Break and you end up sitting on your couch, looking at your March Madness bracket, trying to decide which upsets to go with, and painfully watching the clock tick down the seconds until game time.

I hate to even type the words but……. I’m so bored.

Poor IP has taken the brunt of my boredom today.  I keep walking into his office and staring at him, then offering up ridiculous suggestions of ways for him to play hooky with me.  Take me to lunch… go to a movie…  nap on the couch….  all code for – entertain your wife who’s going bat shit crazy with too much free time on her hands.

Despite all my talk about longing to have hours to sit and do nothing, when I actually have time to sit and do nothing, I realize that I actually like to be busy.  I think my internal clock craves lists and schedules and chaos.  If I don’t have eight things to do and am not being pulled in four different directions, I don’t know what to do with myself.

‘The quiet scares me ’cause it speaks the truth.’ – P!nk

(Sorry to get all reflective on her here, but hey, it’s my blog, I can type what I want!)  That’s one of my favorite song lyrics.  Maybe this is a chance to develop a new side of Kerry.  Work on slowing my mind and enjoying the calm.  Focus on just being present and enjoying the minute that is in front of me without have to plan, schedule, and do.

Or…..

Maybe I can clean underneath the couches and behind the washer and dryer.  Then I could sew clothing for my dog and organize the attic.  Hey, I’m all for self-reflection, but I just realized being inside my head is scary place to be….

Tricks aren’t just for kids

3-13-13….

Some people dread this day, superstitious, can’t own a black cat or walk under a ladder type of people.  My daughter, on the other hand, loves today.  She has been counting off the days until this very evening for tonight is the night of the Taylor Swift concert.

For those of you who don’t know, Ms. Swift has an obsession with the number 13.  It’s her favorite number.  She writes in on her hand for every concert and using it in significant ways whenever possible.  Apparently, she also has an obsession with Omaha for tonight is the second time she has opened a world tour from our humble little city.  When she opened her Speak Now tour here, I took Paige.  I must say, that gal puts on one heck of a good show.  Now it wasn’t ‘New Kids on the Block phenomenal’ in my book, but then, what is……(Why hello Mr. Wahlberg.  You’re looking lovely this fine evening.  Oh wait, wrong blog.  Sorry….)

Anyway, late last year, Ms. Swift announced that she would be launching her Red tour and once again picked Omaha as the starting location, this year picking 3-13-13, double lucky numbers, as the beginning date.  I don’t know who was happier, Paige or IP.  Here is where I must mention that IP has a slight crush on Taylor Swift.  Any by slight I mean, he’s under the impression that he is the inspiration for all of her lovey, dovey lyrics.  No, I’m serious.  He frequently tells people that Taylor has a secret 39-year-old boyfriend in the midwest that she dates on the DL, using all her celebrity relationships and break-ups to cover-up their relationship.  I mean, why else would she keep opening her tours here?

The minute the tickets went on sale, IP screamed “DIPS”, jumped online and snatched up two tickets.

And this is where us as parents get to have a little fun…..

We knew that we had tickets, but we told Paige that we weren’t able to get any.  Yeah, I know it’s mean, but hey, you’ve got to take these golden opportunities when you can!

Paige spent the last four months asking if we found tickets yet, showing us videos online, dropping hints about the concert getting closer, having walks down memory lane about the previous concert and how much fun it was, and then, of course, performing any chore or task we asked her to do, hoping, just hoping, we would give in and buy those tickets!  (See, how much fun this is!)

We finally broke the news (plus the news that we had the tickets all along) to her on Sunday.  She was waayyyyy to excited to be mad at us for holding out on her; and she knew if she pouted too much, she’d lose out on getting that concert T-shirt!

Well tonight was the night!  I’ve never seen that girl do her homework faster or more accurately!  My daughter and husband, who are usually running late, were dressed for the show and out the door two hours….yes TWO HOURS before curtain call.

IMG_9928

IMG_9930

So you think they are excited?

Ok, I’ll play

The high noon sun is beating down on my messy ponytail while I hide behind a weathered tractor tire.  The rock gravel grinds into my scraped knees as I scrunch down, hoping not to be seen.  As IT approaches, I hold my breath, hoping I won’t be found, paranoid IT can hear my rapid heartbeat.  Please don’t see me, please don’t see me, please don’t see me….

Tag, one of those childhood playground games that all kids loved.  Well, all kids but me.  I was not what you would call a tag enthusiast.  Mostly because I was not a fast, nimble child.  A game of tag to me became a strange strategy session, trying to run out the recess clock while avoiding the dreaded tag at all costs.

So when my blogging friend irishkatie tagged me in an online version of tag, my first reaction was to freak out.  Then I remembered I wasn’t 10 anymore and my heart rate went back to normal.  Katie has been a great find in the blogging world, a truly great soul.  I was happy and honored.  Truly honored.  Of all the bloggers out there in the wordpress world, Katie chose to pick me to tag.   Then I was worried.  As I was reading the game of tag rules and regulations (there seem to be a lot of rules and regs…), I started to freak out a little bit.  Most of my days are a non-stop roller coaster of work, kids homework, household maintenance, and kids activities, days that pass in a blur as I dream of getting to my couch.  My stomach tightened up with anxiety thinking of when I would actually get time to respond properly to this tagging and give Katie the thanks she deserved.

Luckily, the nature gods decided to drop 9 inches of snow on the great state of Nebraska, blessing those of us in education with the gift of a snow day.  After sleeping in, cleaning out all the messy closets and junk drawers, then cuddling with the kiddos for a movie, I hunkered down with my laptop to finally crank out my reply.  So here goes…..

First I’m supposed to post the rules.  (I’m a rule follower, so I’m going to do as told.)

1.  Post rules. 2. Post a picture.  3. Post 11 random facts about myself.  4. Answer the questions given to you in your tag.  5. Tag others. 6. Create 11 questions for those tagged.  7.  Notify those you have tagged.

Number 1 done.  Here’s number two.

photo copy 6

I’m going to spoil number 5, and mention one of my tags now.  Anka is a wonderful fellow blogging friend who honored my last month by making me a “Bon-A-Fide Mommy” and linking me on her blog.  She is a great blogger who is Keeping it Real all the time, plus we freakishly have too much in common!

Eleven random facts…  1. My favorite movie is Say Anything.  “A pen.  I gave her my heart and she gave me a pen.”  2. I have a pencil collection.  They were the cheapest souvenir when on vacation, so I always knew I could get one.  3.  I loved the cartoon Garfield so much I named my cat Odie.  (Don’t judge.)  4. I had a pet beta fish that thought he was a dog.  No seriously, he chased his tail in the bowl and swam to the top when you called him. Oh, and his name was Fluffy.  5. I drink coffee at night, while I’m falling asleep.  Apparently caffeine has no effect on me.  5.  My first concert was New Kids on the Block in 1989.  6.  My favorite concert was New Kids on the Block in 2008.  (Again, don’t judge.)  7. I get up at 5 am everyday and run.  I have issues.  8.  I’m obsessive compulsive about having a clean house.  I will put things away my family is still working with.  No really, I can not stand water spots on my sink.  It’s a sickness.  9.  I love fall because I love wearing sweatshirts with shorts and FOOTBALL!  I order the Red Zone every year and watch football all day Saturday and Sunday.  10. I wear crazy socks everyday, to every event, and they usually don’t match what I’m wearing. 11. I swear like a sailor.

Next…Answering Katie’s questions.

  • 6.1.      How do you think you and I met?  I don’t know.  I think I saw your blog mentioned on someone else’s so I clicked the link and found a friend.
  • 6.2.      How long do you think you will be blogging here?  I hope for a while.  I’ve kept it up over a year now, so I think I’m doing good so far!
  • 6.3.      Whether you like math or not, what do you think is one cool thing about math? I like Math because Math has a definite answer.
  • 6.4.      Whether you believe we are alone in the universe or not, does believing what you do comfort you? Yes, very much.  My faith gives me very much comfort.
  • 6.5.      What is an embarrassing thing that happened to you since the beginning of 2013?  Sending a text to the wrong person!
  • 6.6.      What is something you have done since the beginning of 2013 that you are proud of? I made Chicken Pot Pie from scratch last weekend…and the fam LOVED it!
  • 6.7.      What did you dream about last night? I can’t tell you, you’ll blush….
  • 6.8.      We’ve all seen the, ‘What 5 people would you want a dinner party?’ question.  Say you got all 5 there, what would you serve for dinner?  Steak and mashed potatoes, corn bread with honey, corn on the cob.
  • 6.9.      Can you give the next in the sequence? OTTFFS   Um, no…..
  • 6.10.    All of you that I have tagged loved to write.  What kind of writing do you like to do?  I like to tell stories from my life about situations that I found funny.  As I’m writing, I’m hoping that you all will find them funny too!
  • 6.11.    What makes you happy when you are feeling down?  Singing at the top of my lungs in my car.  I’m really good…I think.

Here’s where my lack of tech knowledge will come into play.  I hope these links work.

Keeping it Real

mom of 3 and i need a bigger car!

motherhoodisanart

Katie

Mar on the Run!

Ok, I promise, I’m almost done. Here are my questions.

1.  Why did you start blogging?

2.  Biggest, yet to be accomplished, dream?

3.  Biggest fear?

4.  Biggest failure?

5.  Biggest regret?

6.  Secret crush?

7.  Favorite color?

8.  Team who?

9.  Worst fashion faux pas?

10.  Secret food you love, but would never admit to others?

11.  If you had one day to yourself, no chores or errands to do, what would you do?

And exhale… I’m finally no longer IT.  Whew!  No tag back!  😉

 

It’s hard to get sympathy somedays

When I started this blog, since I am an obsessive, Type A personality, I made it very clear with myself (Yes I talk to myself, don’t judge) that I wasn’t going to give myself any ‘rules’ or ‘have-tos’ regarding posts.  I don’t have a defined list of blog topics, which should be obvious by my range of topics.  If it strikes my fancy, I blog about it.  I also didn’t require myself to post a certain number of times a week.  Some weeks I’ve ended up with three posts and some with one.  I didn’t want to force myself to post if I hadn’t been inspired.  Even I know that, despite how much I might want to , I can’t schedule being creative!

You might have noticed that I had a two-week hiatus in posts during February.  (You didn’t?  Imagine me crying!)  Well, I had a really good reason for it….. I WAS IN CANCUN!

Now, before to go getting all crappy with me.  I was FORCED to go to Cancun on a business trip.  That’s right, forced.  IP was hired to shoot a wedding there, so we had to fly all the way to a tropical paradise in the middle of February and suffer through 87* heat, day long sunshine, and breathtaking sunsets.  I mean really, who wants to deal with this everyday???

IMG_2055

It was horrible.  And then, to make matters worse, the whole time we were there, people kept doing things for us: cleaning our room, turning down our bed and leaving chocolates, bringing us endless drinks while we lounged poolside alternating between swimming, tanning, reading, and napping.  I mean really.  It was just terrible!

IMG_9926

~ Sidebar…. When one is in Cancun, receiving said endless free drinks and soaking in the tropical sunshine, please be careful not to end up like this lady.

IMG_0009

Nothing will spoil a mid-winter get away like drowning in a resort swimming pool.  Plus yakking up the entire contents of your stomach on the pool deck will not endear you to the other guests! ~

Anyhoo, while away, I may or may not have burned my pale, February skin to a crisp while relaxing on the white sand beaches near the equator.

IMG_9916

Ok, I did.  I burned the hell out of my skin.

IMG_9938

And do you know what I learned, no one really wants to hear about mid-winter sunburn you received while they were stuck digging out from the nine inches of snow they received while you were gone.  No love, no sympathy, no concern for the heart-wrenching ordeal I am having to endure.  In fact, they take sick pleasure in watching the top layer of my skin flake off.  Sick bastards!

photo copy 6

For those of you that do care, I am recovering slowly for this whole ordeal, getting a little better a day at a time.  Despite the pain and trauma we suffered through, we are currently accepting applications for any other couples who want to get married in Cancun.  For their joy and dream wedding, we would be willing to endure the whole experience again.  That’s just the kind of people we are!

IMG_0033