I got nothing.

You know those times when you engage in a conversation and, as it spirals out of control, you wish you had a board to smash against your head or a needle to poke in your eye, because self-mutilation would be a better decision than continuing this back and forth exchange.  Please grab a seat and enjoy my misery…..

Person – “Hey!  The Packers lost yesterday!  Ha!”

(Sidebar – I am a huge Green Bay Packers Fan..HUGE.  I have game day routines and gear.  I don’t take calls during games and was a raging bitch on wheels the second half as their imminent loss in the playoffs became apparent.  I engaged in a ranting, profanity-laced session and had one Facebook casualty in the process.  It was necessary…He’s a Bears Fan.)

Me – “It was Saturday.  And yes, I’m aware.”

Person – “Beat by my 49ers.”

Me – “Your 49ers?  You don’t even like them.  My favorite type of fan is one who comes out of the wood-work AFTER a win.”

Person – “I do like them.  I like lots of teams.  The Chargers.  The Yankees.  The Red Sox.”

Me – “Um.  1.  Those are different sports.  And 2. You can’t like the Yankees AND the Red Sox.  They’re rivals.”

Person – “Yes I can.  I’m between them.  I also like the Heat.”

Me – “Different sport…again.”

Person – “I’m really mad that they haven’t said who’s in the Super Bowl yet.”

Me – “That’s because the playoffs are still going on.”

Person – “I hope the Giants don’t make it.  I hate them.”

Me – “Well, they won’t because they didn’t make it into the playoffs.”

Person – “Or the Broncos.  They suck.”

Me – “Well they actually did make it into the playoffs, but they lost this last weekend.”

Person – “That’s because Eli sucks.”

Me – “Um, Eli doesn’t play for the Broncos, that’s Payton.”

Person – “Well, Tim Tebow never got them to the playoffs.”

Me – “Actually he did, last year, won a play-off game for them in overtime.”

Person – “No he didn’t”

Me – (Blank Stare) “I got nothing.”

Now where the hell did I put that board?????




  1. I had that same basic conversation with a guy at work today. I’m a Broncos fan. A not happy fan as of late. He is a cowboys fan…..this weekend a Texans fan…next weekend…he will probably wait until the weekend is over to decide. Ugghh. I feel your pain.

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