As I was driving to meet friends the other night, I looked at my clock and realized that I was a few minutes early.

I knew that I was going to have to run by the store later that day for printer ink  (How are we out of printer ink AGAIN?!?!?  It feels like I buy printer ink every week!) and a fantasy football magazine.  (Yes, I have a fantasy football league.  I LOVE football.  I LOVE all sports.  I watch ESPN by choice.  I might be a dude.)

Just my luck, Wal-Mart was in the same shopping complex as where I was going.  SCORE!  I’m thought ‘I’m going to get in, get my items, and I’ll still beat her to the restaurant!’

I parked and ran in.

I found the ink right away.  (Side bar…what is the difference between standard capacity and moderate capacity?  Even the guy there didn’t know.)  Just pick one.  You know you’ll be back next week when the printer again refuses to print claiming to be out of ink.

Next, is the magazine.  Liddy’s Sports Fantasy Football 2012…looks as good as any, plus, it has Aaron Rodgers on the cover, so that’s a no brainer.  (For you non football folks, he’s the quarterback of my Green Bay Packers!  Kick off in two weeks!)

Oh Chex Mix!  It wasn’t on the list, but Bold and Spicy is Yummy and Tasty, so in my arms it goes.

Now it’s time to blow this popsicle stand, and I’m still ahead of schedule!

Speedy checkout, here I come.

And here I screech to a grinding halt.

There is exactly one of four speedy checkouts actually open and a line is eight deep.

I quickly scan the rest of the checkouts.  Only two other ones are open, and they also have long lines plus over flowing carts.

I take my place in the back.

Maybe she really is speedy….

Nope.  Time drags on.  My friend starts texting me.  ‘Are you here?’

Um, no, not even close.

Do they purposely put the slowest cashiers in the speedy lane to teach us a lesson?  They should add that scrunched up ‘Plan Ahead’ sign and pump laugh tracks through the sound system.

Finally, I put my head down, defeated.

Wal-Mart – 1

Inky, Chexy, Football Chic – 0




  1. No matter what line I get in it takes forever. I find the line with one person and think great I’ll get in and out. But NOOOO! That is the person that needs a price look up and then wants to know why it isn’t on the sale price, oh that is the other one, so they have to do an exchange and then that person wants a lotto ticket too and THEN they can’t figure out how to use the debit card machine! Every other line has moved but I’m still waiting for the one person in front of me to finally get done. Happens every damn time. I might as well start to bring a chair and a book in with me to give me something to do while I wait to buy my three things.

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